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Subject: "ghsv 1, very depressed"     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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kendrak
Member since Feb-22-11
3 posts
Mar-01-11, 11:03 PM (CST)
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"ghsv 1, very depressed"
 
   Hey, I have had ghsv 1 for 3.5 years, I havent dealt with it at all yet because I was with the guy who gave it to me untill a few months ago. Im scared about dating im only 19. Today my friends were talking about how gross cold sores are, which made me feel like i was suuuper gross. I dunno, im lost. Im scared. anyone with ghsv 1 out there?


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  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
  RE: ghsv 1, very depressed soccer_girl12 Mar-02-11 1
     RE: ghsv 1, very depressed kendrak Mar-03-11 2
         RE: ghsv 1, very depressed soccer_girl12 Mar-04-11 3
             RE: ghsv 1, very depressed soccer_girl12 Mar-04-11 4
                 RE: ghsv 1, very depressed kendrak Mar-06-11 5
                     RE: ghsv 1, very depressed Panda1823 Aug-28-11 7
  RE: ghsv 1, very depressed L32 Nov-21-11 8
  RE: ghsv 1, very depressed adriana21 Nov-28-11 9
     RE: ghsv 1, very depressed Panda1823 Nov-26-12 10
         RE: ghsv 1, very depressed pinkpanther0215 Dec-14-12 11
             RE: ghsv 1, very depressed Panda1823 Jan-02-13 12
                 RE: ghsv 1, very depressed jasmine_8 Feb-14-13 13

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soccer_girl12
Member since Feb-5-11
8 posts
Mar-02-11, 01:44 AM (CST)
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1. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #0
 
   I just recently found out that I have genital herpes. I'm not sure yet if its 1 or 2, I'll know when I go to get blood tests done. I'm kind of in the same boat as you. I was with the guy who I got this from for 5 years... we aren't together now due to completely unrelated reasons. Just like you I'm only 19. I've only known about this for about a month now so I'm still dealing with the fact that I have it. I've been a little nervous about dating... but reading a lot of posts on this site has helped me get past that a little bit. As far as your friends making jokes I know that might not be easy. I've found that I get some enjoyment myself out of making jokes with my girlfriends who know that I have this. Like I said I'm newly diagnosed and still struggling to accept this every day so I might not be the best person to help you... but I thought it would be nice for you to know that you're not the only 19 year old out there who is struggling with this. I do think in the end that we'll find out we're making a bigger deal out of this than necessary though


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kendrak
Member since Feb-22-11
3 posts
Mar-03-11, 04:17 PM (CST)
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2. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #1
 
   hey we have so much in common! did you ever tell the guy he gave you herpes?

I saw that you said your mom also has it! crazy! when I found out I also found out my dad has it as well....makes you think how common this is.

my dad has type 2, but you said your mom got it from a cold sore? do you mind me asking how she dealt with that? just because I have that type as well.

Let me know how your feeling also, you can pm me if you want. thanks for replying by the way, im really lost!


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soccer_girl12
Member since Feb-5-11
8 posts
Mar-04-11, 02:21 AM (CST)
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3. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #2
 
   LAST EDITED ON Mar-04-11 AT 02:24 AM (CST)
 
I would PM you but I don't know how haha

I did tell my ex as soon as I found out, because at that time I was unaware that it could stay dormant or that you could get it from a cold sore, so I of course automatically assumed he was cheating... (I've never been with anybody else, I was with him since I was 14). Anyways I really don't think that he did now and we ended up ending things because we were already in a long distance relationship and he owns 3 businesses while I am double majoring and holding down a job and extra curriculars. No time for each other.

As far as my mother, I talked to her a lot in the beginning. I don't think I would be where I'm at right now if not for her. She said she felt the same way I did at first, but like me began to get over it really fast. It didn't really effect her that much. She's lived a perfectly normal life. She's married with six children and I never even knew she had it until I called and told her about mine. Also I know that the ghsv1 usually has a lot less break outs... my mom has only had 7 breakouts in 23 years. She just had her first one in 7 years in January. So it's really not been hard for her to deal with at all.

I know you're lost. I feel that way too sometimes... but I'm confident that's going to pass for me and for you as well.


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soccer_girl12
Member since Feb-5-11
8 posts
Mar-04-11, 02:22 AM (CST)
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4. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #3
 
   LAST EDITED ON Mar-04-11 AT 02:24 AM (CST)
 
So this one is an accident, and I don't know how to get rid of it


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kendrak
Member since Feb-22-11
3 posts
Mar-06-11, 01:39 PM (CST)
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5. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #4
 
   hey what did your boyfriend say when you told him? I dunno why I cant seem to get past this, i just have no idea how to talk about this with a partner when im so young, i wouldnt blame guys to not wanna get herpes in their dating time.

im also scared that if someone does accept it, i will feel as though i cant break up with them because they might tell everyone, i dunno , its so hard, i dont know what to do im freakin out to say the least! its weird because i dont think my life wont work out eventually, i just think its gonna take a lot of struggle to get there.


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Panda1823
Member since Aug-28-11
4 posts
Aug-28-11, 02:56 AM (CST)
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7. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #5
 
   Im new to all this too...ive only known ive had Hsv 2 for a few months now and never even had an outbreak until a few weeks after I found out. Ive been not dealing well with finding out either. I also found out my parents have lived with this for over 26 yrs, and my mom has had 3 children. My mom told me after I told her I had it. After my 1st outbbreak I was devastated. I felt like I was damaged goods now. Got soo mad at my bf who gave it to me cause he never had an ob and didnt know he had it until I got tested.(hes the only man ive been with since my last std check up). He just tonight realized hes having an ob on his mouth and hes been very quiet and not speaking about it and i wanna talk about it a little, am I crazy? I look up and try to learn all I can since this is something I have to live with for the rest of my life now.


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L32
Member since Nov-12-11
7 posts
Nov-21-11, 09:46 AM (CST)
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8. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #0
 
   Hi there, i know how you feel! I've just been diagnosed with genital herpes simplex 1 about a month ago. I was devastated when I first found out but after having read ALOT about it, it's not that bad! We have bodies, we are not perfect, we are not an ideal and life throws you curve balls once and a while that you have to adapt to. My mother, brother and sister all have HSV1 orally, they all caught it as children, it's no biggy when they get a break-out. My mother gets an outbreak once ever year mostly because she's a very stressed out person and my father has never contracted herpes and they've been together for 30 years! When my mom gets a cold sore my dad still even kisses her, cause he doesn't care and loves her so much, and my mom isn't ashamed about it at all. I'd say be open with what you have, I've told many friends and family members when I first learnt I had it, all of them told me of how many of their friends have it, and all assured me it's not nearly close to the worst thing in the world. Try to think of how many blessings you have in your life, how many awful diseases you DON'T have. Then realize you have nothing to feel ashamed about and have a very manageable virus.


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adriana21
Member since Aug-23-11
31 posts
Nov-28-11, 07:58 AM (CST)
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9. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #0
 
   Well the thing is that a significant portion of the population already has it. Come to think of it, there are far worse diseases that you could have gotten. The pictures that people see in google and other media are actually the severe cases.

“God gives us tests not for Him
to see what we are made of, but
for us to see what we are made
up of”


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Panda1823
Member since Aug-28-11
4 posts
Nov-26-12, 12:35 PM (CST)
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10. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #9
 
   So since my last post a long time ago, I have found out that the bf that gave me this had cheated on me several times, we are now no longer together. I now am struggling with how do i even date someone new, its been 1 year since him and i split up and i dont know how to work thru my anger at him. I know it seems to be a very common thing these days but i still am mad at him for this. Now whenever i start talking to someone new I push him away cause I dont wanna have that conversation with him. How can i get past this? I dont know how to work thru my anger at my ex cause i know hes out there sleeping around like he did when we were together without any cares and me i just cant do that, and How can I move on with someone new? Do i tell them right away? Help please..


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pinkpanther0215
Member since Nov-20-12
2 posts
Dec-14-12, 12:34 PM (CST)
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11. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #10
 
   Aww I'm sorry girl. That sucks! I've been there and done that. I found out that the person who gave me hsv cheated on me, too. I went through a very angry/low point for a long time before I realized that someone out there would really show me what love is like and would love me for me despite my unfortunate, annoying skin condition (which is what I like to refer to it as). I honestly never realized just how common HSV-1 is, which didn't make me feel so "gross". But I definitely went through that phase. Trust me darlin, it'll pass as time goes by. I decided to focus on myself for awhile and not really worry about dating. Once I did that, one random day, I met my now boyfriend who just so happens to be the most amazing man in the world. I sat him down and had a discussion with him and I openly told him about my condition and he said it didn't matter & that he loved me regardless. I've maintained complete openness and honesty with him and whenever he has a question, I will always answer it to the best of my knowledge or ask my doctor. Honesty really is the best policy. Still to this day, he is herpes free. I didn't just go around telling everyone though. I told myself that I would only tell someone who I felt was worthy and he was/is just that. Don't worry about throwing yourself into the dating world. When it's meant to happen, it will. There's much more of a social stigma attached to both HSV-1&2 than anything. It isn't the end of the world. You're still a beautiful girl/person & you'll find happiness. You just first have to learn to love yourself again. Don't let it define you. I did that and I wish I could take back those years because it isn't worth it. I hope this helps a little. Message me if you need to. *hugs* XOXO


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Panda1823
Member since Aug-28-11
4 posts
Jan-02-13, 11:18 AM (CST)
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12. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #11
 
   So im working on my anger issues...Trying to get back to who I was before I met my ex, I was so happy then and throughout our 2 year relationship i became this person i didnt know anymore. This was just the icing on the cake for me. I can get past the hitting and the lying but I donno how to deal with my HSV-2. But im working on it. I'd love to be in a relationship again cause it gets lonely but at the same time I realized I need to focus on me. I'm just gonna wait for my one random day like you did Thanks for the encouragement!


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jasmine_8
Member since Feb-14-13
1 posts
Feb-14-13, 12:04 PM (CST)
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13. "RE: ghsv 1, very depressed"
In response to message #12
 
   Hi, I'm new to this site and I just wanted to get some advice. I'm 16 and in high school and I've been getting coldsores since I was little. I know that I have herpes from frequent outbreaks and they affect my self esteem a lot. I beg my mom not to make me go to school everytime I have a sore because I know that people will point it out and make fun of me. I've accepted that It's never going to go away but I just want to try to avoid people knowing while I'm in highschool because so many are immature and misinformed of what and how the virus works. I feel like I get outbreaks more than anyone ever does. I'm aware that hormones and stress probably play a huge role in this case but I was wondering if there are any ways to decrease the number of outbreaks so I can stop missing school and cope with this situation more positively. I feel like I can't allow myself to like anyone or let anyone like me because of the fear of them rejecting me and having everyone know about it. I want to have a physical relationship with someone but I don't feel like anyone highschool boy would understand. I'm not depressed by this matter but it hurts so much.


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