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Conferences Under 25, (Give or take a few) Topic #1875
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bluebell
Member since Apr-6-12
1 posts
Apr-06-12, 07:19 AM (CST)
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"Relationships"
 
   I was diagnosed with HSV2 about a week ago. I was dating this guy pretty regularly who I care about, and I told him when I got diagnosed. He got tested as well, and when he found out he didn't have HSV2 he decided he didn't want to risk getting it from me and basically ended the relationship.

It's hard because I feel like I got dumped for a reason I can't control and can't change. Plus it seems hypocritical--- so many people have herpes and don't know, unless he's going to require everyone he plans on sleeping with to get tested he'll still be at risk.

I know there are ways to decrease your risk of passing on HSV. I don't know if I should continue to share information about this with him in hopes of him changing his mind or if I should just give up and try to move on.

Has anyone been in a similar situation?


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Lenoreadmin
Member since Oct-22-04
4277 posts
Apr-06-12, 08:30 AM (CST)
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1. "RE: Relationships"
In response to message #0
 
   How were you diagnosed? Are you having symptoms?

It always kind of amazes me when people have that reaction. If this guy has had sex with 4 women, statistically one of them has had HSV2 and 2 of them have had HSV1. It makes it a little hard to avoid, unless you just want to be in denial and pretend that the only people who have this virus are the people who tell you that they have it.

If someone is really into you they are going to take the time to learn more and make an informed decision. I guess you could ask him if he's interested in learning more about herpes especially since you probably aren't going to be the only woman he meets that has it. It kind of seems like someone who backs off right away just doesn't want to take the time to find out more.


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383chick
Member since May-6-12
9 posts
May-07-12, 00:22 AM (CST)
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2. "RE: Relationships"
In response to message #0
 
   i can relate, my guy just walked out on me as well, i guess you could offer him to learn about it, but i dont think its gonna change anything, did he ask u questions or he made descision himself? my was herpesfobic, he would tell me im the woman he really wants but cant have, and no matter how he feels about me he would never be able to accept me with my herpes, so i never tried to change his mind, cuz its his descision and you have to accept it..what if he will get the herpes from u? he will blame u for the rest of his life, or if he tries to accept it, he might think of the virus every time you gonna have sex..i desided to let mine go without trying to change his mind but i told him about my feelings first, everything that was in my heart, and i am in love with him...cuz if after that he doesnt tries to educate himself about the subject and try make things work..means you got a wrong guy, and things wouldnt work out for any other reason, he really wanted to keep in touch and stay good friends though, but im not offering him kinda benefit, cuz i dont want to have anybody who sees me like one walking virus close to me, so try if you feel you really want to..all in all its better to regret smth u ve done that smth u havent, dont hold back and good luck


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