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Subject: "The New Phase..."     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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Conferences Under 25, (Give or take a few) Topic #1887
Reading Topic #1887
Member since Jul-28-12
2 posts
Jul-28-12, 05:41 AM (CST)
Click to EMail Blessed_Star13 Click to send private message to Blessed_Star13 Click to add this user to your buddy list  
"The New Phase..."
   Hey all!! I'm glad I found this forum...now I can talk! Lol...to make a long story short...I was diagnosed with HSV2 in October of last year. My boyfriend at the time wasn't concerned AT ALL...it sounds sweet but consider the fact that I had been tested for herpes in July of that year and tested negative...it was a problem. He and I had been together and sexually active since February of that year so it raised a million questions in my confused mind! I chose to overlook how nonchalant he was because it felt good to have someone accept me with my new found, life long best friend (as I like to call it). But recently, along with other things...I decided to end the relationship because I simply could not trust him. He FINALLY decided to get tested for HSV in April of this year...but he kept it a secret that he did and that he tested positive. He also kept it a secret that he in fact had experienced outbreaks around that time. It took him MONTHS to address the issue and when he finally did...he didn't tell me! Idk...it just all seems shady and I totally resent him for that.
SO...now I am SINGLE, extremely happy with my decision, and excited at the possibility of the real love of my life...but HER-FREAKIN-PES is in the picture! Lol...it's worrying me crazy. I'm a sexual being...as we humans tend to be...and I love affection and the idea of having sex and it's all passionate and just a result of the vibe in the room...but I can no longer do that because I HAVE to give this disclaimer before any type of engagement. Talk about a mood killer! Even with protection, I will just feel guilty if I don't tell my partner about my status (I'm HUGE on knowing your status and knowing risks)...but I feel like I'm going to be throwing my chances away of a care free night of hot passion! Lol (protected hot passion of course)...How on earth do you deal when things are hot n heavy in the moment and you kinda HAVE to share the news??

Oh...Herpes and I have a pretty decent relationship so that's why my tone is playful. If it's gonna live with me...it kinda has to have a sense of humor as well!

But I would LOVE some feedback and maybe some experiences you all wouldn't mind sharing!

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Member since Aug-2-12
1 posts
Aug-02-12, 04:42 PM (CST)
Click to EMail cocoabean26 Click to send private message to cocoabean26 Click to view user profileClick to add this user to your buddy list Click to send message via ICQ  
1. "RE: The New Phase..."
In response to message #0
   It's awesome you have such a great sense of humor with the HERPES. I myself just got diagnosed a this morning. Quite a shock when I went into the doctor to get a rash looked at and some test results back and she slammed me with this delightful news and gave me a prescription and some gel for discomfort... bleh. I am in need of some advice now.

My boyfriend. We have been friends for a year now. But started actually seeing each other/sleeping together a few months ago. Normally, I feel comfortable talking with him about ANYTHING. This little situation however... nervous. Ive never had any problems with STDs etc ever. And the last time I was tested was summer last year. I am going out on a limb here and assuming I caught the herps from him... But I suppose I cant be sure. How did you bring this up with your ex boyfriend if you dont mind me asking? I really dont want herpes to ruin my life and especially my sex life.

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Member since Jul-28-12
2 posts
Aug-14-12, 00:45 AM (CST)
Click to EMail Blessed_Star13 Click to send private message to Blessed_Star13 Click to add this user to your buddy list  
2. "RE: The New Phase..."
In response to message #1
   Yeah you definitely can't be sure. I started to blame myself for a brief second when in reality he's the one who infected me. But I first watched a DVD that my doctor gave me so I could be informed when I told him. Because we were in a long distance relationship I had to call him, which was very informal, but hey, it had to be done. Anyway I was just straight forward and told him I had gone to the doctor and at the time she assumed it was Herpes, I hadn't gotten my results back yet. But I told him and like I said he was surprisingly calm about it. But I still requested that he be tested because I needed to know where I got it from. (I tested negative for herpes months prior to that but that was my way of letting him know that he was pretty much the culprit). But don't let it ruin your life...I've not been intimate with anyone since then and honestly I don't really want to be, not now at least. But I just suggest you educate yourself on it as much as you can and pay attention to your body and how often you have outbreaks. I decided I won't be sexually active because I need to get to know the virus and how it works in my body. By the time I'm ready to have "the talk" with someone else, I'll be able to tell them EXACTLY how it works and the possible risks. It will be a year that I've had HSV2 in October and in between now and then I've probably had about 5 outbreaks...I suspect I'll have maybe 2 more before then but I'm about to try the daily Valtrex out so we shall see! In the meantime stay positive...it's a tough time I know, but it will get better I PROMISE!!

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