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Conferences Relationships Topic #1146
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CuriousOne
Member since Jul-12-14
2 posts
Jul-12-14, 05:24 PM (CST)
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"Long Distance Relationship"
 
   I have never had the talk with anyone. I have dated someone from an online website for people who share the same conditions. There aren't many guys on their whom I'd be interested in dating. I started talking to someone via a chat messenger. He says he's never dated anyone long distance before. He didn't intend to, but he really is interested in me and I am interested in him. We Skype a lot and talk every day. He is really into me. I'm weary because he has admitted to me that he doesn't like staying at hotels or being bare foot in the car because he has fears of "catching something." I'm worried that when I tell him (I'm waiting to tell him before we ever even think about having sex) he will RUN. Should I just end it now? Before he drives to visit me? It's an awful long journey and lots of money to spend on someone. He has very high values and morals and is very relationship oriented.

I don't know what to do! IF I should even bother continuing this or not. HE says he thinks about me every morning, afternoon, and night...every second. But if he knew..would he overlook his fears???

I don't know when to tell him either. When he comes to visit me we have agreed upon not having sex. To wait. Should I tell him the day he is about to leave to go back home? Or until we actually decide to do it..tell him before then (Not RIGHT before we have sex days before of course)?? He and I will be investing our time together and money...so when would be best to tell him?!

Also, I have been diagnosed with HSV-1 oral herpes (a blood test), but I never get OB's on my lips. Occasionally I get a round zit (I get adult acne occasionally..my mom has it too) looking type thing at the corner of my mouth, but my mom doesn't think that's HSV-1 (she's an RN). So if he comes he will want to kiss me at some point. Shouldn't I tell him before I kiss him?


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Rajahadmin
Charter Member
15528 posts
Jul-12-14, 08:02 PM (CST)
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1. "That's a good question..."
In response to message #0
 
I had a successful 1,000 mile long distance relationship with the woman that I've now been married to for 15 years.

I was very up front about my status with her and it didn't bother her a bit, but it's different for every person.

Have you read Terri Warren's free Herpes Handbook? It might be worth a few minutes of your time. Of course, I also recommend her "The Good News about the Bad News", but it's not free.

I am a little concerned about the guy you describe if he is really OCD about "getting something". I'd suggest being honest with him before he makes a trip that is already uncomfortable for him if he is nervous about hotels. HSV might be too much for him. The other side of the coin is that it's often better to say some things in person.

"Do the Right Thing. It will gratify some people and astound the rest." - Paraphrased from Mark Twain


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