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Subject: "My Story"     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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deb54
Member since Jun-21-10
269 posts
Aug-02-10, 11:19 AM (CST)
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"My Story"
 
   Hi everyone. I have been using this site for over a year and just recently started posting. My "story" starts in 1975 which is when I believe I was infected with HSV II. I had swollen lymph glands and my vaginal area was sore. I was 20 years old and in the process of moving to Washington, D.C. so did not see a gyno until I moved and by then all symptoms were gone. I had no idea what it could be and asked to be tested for everything--which came back negative. Of course, I now realize that herpes testing was not done. I had no more OB's or any sign that anything was wrong until 1981 and then a blister would appear and be gone within a day and I didn't think much about it. Finally when I was studying to become a nurse in 1992 I read about herpes and I remember writing in the margin of the book, "That's what I have." But again, by that time I was married and my husband was impotent and there was no sexual contact, so I didn't seek any medical testing or treatment. The OB's were very infrequent and did not impact my life--until my husband died. The stress of caring for him in his last year of life and watching him die was worse than anything herpes could do to me. After he died I was distraught and had OB's every month and they became worse--I now realize my immune system was out of whack due to my emotions. About a year after my husband died I starting dating. I told the first guy that I had herpes and his response was "So what, most people do and I have it too." After I broke up with him I joined a dating site as I live in a small town and being a widow in your 50's and not a drinker or a smoker, I don't go out much and it is difficult to meet people. Anyway, I have made it a policy to tell about my herpes status on the second date. I also changed health care providers as I tried to get on the correct dose of acyclovir when I went to my NP locally and she would never prescribe the correct dose even when I argued with her and told her to look it up in the PDR. Now I go to a NP who was mentioned on Terri Warren's site and this gal is just wonderful--Jane Kiley in Rockford. So I've been on the correct dose of acyclovir and haven't had an OB since. I also make my partner use condoms. To my knowledge, none of the three sexual partners I've had have gotten herpes. I have found that it is more difficult to find a new life partner than it is to deal with herpes. Only one man was scared of the herpes, but we still were able to have fun together and I never encouraged him to do anything he was uncomfortable with--we still remain friends. So for all of you out there newly diagnosed and upset I want you to know that there are far worse conditions and diseases and it is your attitude that defines how your life is lived. Oh, I finally did get the HerpeSelect test this January and as Jane told me when she called, "Well now you know what you already knew." I have been very open with my herpes diagnosis within my family. Of course, so many of my family has HSV I and they don't think anything about it--just make comments like, "Oh, I have a cold sore again." Honestly, I am more concerned about breast cancer, as I watched my mom die of that over a 10 year period. I also want to thank all the people who post to this site and ask questions, educate themselves and others. And the wonderful people who respond--Grace, Rajah, Starrat etc etc. So here I am at age 55 with HSV II, but my life is wonderful. I am retired and in a hopeful relationship. I consider this site part of my family and I thank each one of you--I laugh a lot when reading posts here and also want to reach out and hug those that are upset.


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Rajahadmin
Charter Member
15328 posts
Aug-02-10, 01:39 PM (CST)
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1. "((((HUG))))"
In response to message #0
 
Welcome to the family! Glad to have you aboard. Good luck with your relationship. You've got the right attitude.

"Do the Right Thing. It will gratify some people and astound the rest." - Paraphrased from Mark Twain


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starrattadmin
Charter Member
2012 posts
Aug-02-10, 02:50 PM (CST)
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2. "Thanks for Sharing"
In response to message #0
 
Deb54 -

Thank you for reaching out with your story, I'm sure it will help someone out there in need of support. We are all so much more than just this pesky illness.

My condolences over losing your husband, no matter how you lose someone it leaves a gap in your life.

Of course be sure to let us know if there is anyway we can help you.

Be well,
Lorraine

Hoe eet jy 'n olifant? Bietjie vir bietjie.
(Translation from Afrikans: How do you eat an elephant? Bit by bit.)


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Helene
Member since May-11-12
20 posts
May-11-12, 07:46 PM (CST)
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3. "RE: My Story"
In response to message #0
 
   So glad I just read your story! Excellent! This is excellent! I want to know that my life is not over at 54 because I have herpes. I get the official culture and blood test back on Monday, but I know. What else could it be? Thank you so much. Thank you for sharing your beautiful soul shine.


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deb54
Member since Jun-21-10
269 posts
May-12-12, 12:07 PM (CST)
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4. "RE: My Story"
In response to message #3
 
   Hi Helene. NO matter what your test results will be on Monday, you are still the same person you have always been. I just reread my original post and I have to tell you that since then I found the right man for me and we've been living together and happy for over a year now. Of course I was upfront with him about the herpes and it didn't matter. He even went and got tested as he'd never done that before and found out he has oral HSVI. So my life is even better than before and I am happier than before and now I'm 57!! So look forward to your future and know that you aren't alone. Deb


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