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Subject: "13 years later, now I'm mad/sad"     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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a grrl
Member since Oct-20-03
263 posts
May-31-16, 10:33 PM (CST)
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"13 years later, now I'm mad/sad"
 
   Update! It's been a lonnnnnnnnng time =)
I was diagnosed in 2003, I ended up marrying my herpetraitor, heh. Spent a lot of time here and newbies- this is a good place to be!
I have two lovely sons, mild infrequent outbreaks that I treat with acyclovir as needed.

But now, I am divorced, and dating. In 2014, I dated one muggle (non-HSV person). He knew I had it, was a friend for years. He got scared as we got close to being intimate so we broke up.

I turned to positive singles website and met a great guy. I had a rough year (lost 2 immediate family members) and developed some problematic fibroids. The grief and the hormones I started to suppress my me steal cycle left me slightly apathetic and we broke up. I am devastated. Been crying a month. Went back on positive singles at the suggestion of my BFF, but seriously, even without the break-up, there's no one right now I'd even want a coffee with, lol.

The herpes doesn't bother me. But being a single mom at 45 and thinking about having the talk and dating makes me kinda depressed at times.

Lots of love. I am by nature optimistic and energetic, but there is no wind in my sails this year so far.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit." - Aristotle


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Rajahadmin
Charter Member
15692 posts
Jun-10-16, 03:07 PM (CST)
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1. "Hi, Agrrl !!"
In response to message #0
 
Yes, it's been a long time and a lot of water under the bridge. Some of us are still here, but not as often as back then.

Love your use of the term "Muggle".

I am afraid I can't give much advice on the dating thing as I'm still happily married for the past 17 years to the same wonderful lady who didn't care a bit that I had herpes.

As far as advice in general, give it time to get the wind back in your sails and speaking of sails, remember that we can't change the wind, but we can change how we set our sails.

"Do the Right Thing. It will gratify some people and astound the rest." - Paraphrased from Mark Twain


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graceadmin
Charter Member
13637 posts
Jun-16-16, 12:45 PM (CST)
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2. "RE: 13 years later, now I'm mad/sad"
In response to message #0
 
I hear you - pickings can be slim when it comes to dating!!

I remain hopeful that someone I am compatible with for the long term is out there. It does get old to have to disclose my hsv each time I do find someone to date. I have worked it into a whole discussion on std's and testing since most folks I have noticed assume that they "aren't that kind of person" to get a std and have never had testing. I remind myself that it's as much about protecting me from std's as it is disclosing my herpes to them.

Good luck finding someone and don't limit yourself to std dating sites!! You can get the risk of transmission so low it makes no sense to limit yourself when the pickings are already so slim at times!!

grace

The first step in stopping the perceived stigma about genital herpes - is to stop believing in it yourself


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deb54
Member since Jun-21-10
476 posts
Jun-18-16, 03:51 PM (CST)
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3. "RE: 13 years later, now I'm mad/sad"
In response to message #2
 
   Grace is right--you can date anyone. I found my bf online and he's a "muggle" and we have been together since Jan 2011. And I was in my 50's. The right person is out there, it is just work to find them.


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