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Subject: "Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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LRain_6886
Member since Sep-12-13
4 posts
Sep-12-13, 11:59 AM (CST)
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"Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."
 
   Does anyone know how accurate the blood tests for HSV were in 1987? My story: I was diagnosed in Oct. 1987 after having been with my 2nd sexual partner ever. My first contact was 5 months before with a guy I was friends with and we only had sex once. No symptoms until about a month after my 2nd partner and I had started having sex around September '87.

I had symptoms for about 3 weeks before going to the doctor. I was diagnosed after having a culture done. I thought I had a kidney infection until the doctor did a visual examination. During this time my 2nd partner and I were still having frequent sex until the day before I went to see the doc(too painful by then). My culture came back positive a few weeks later.

After my initial doctor visit, I was hysterical and called my boyfriend. We met and I broke the news. He told me that he thought it was very possible I might have contracted it from him. Told me that if he did have it, he was not aware of it but would not be surprised. Since he had no symptoms, he immediately went to his doctor and had a herpes blood test.

He was 24 y/o at the time & had just come out of the military. He had come back to college to finish his degree. I was 19 and a college freshman. He admitted to me after I told him that he had probably had sexual contact with at least 60 women, some of them prostitutes while he was in the military. He even had pictures that he showed me later with prostitutes sitting in his lap in South America. I was floored when he admitted this.

A few weeks later he called to tell me his blood test came back negative. When I went back to my Ob/Gyn, he asked me questions about who my boyfriend was. When I told him he rolled his eyes and said "Oh my God, I am not surprised!" Turns out my doctor was friends with his family & knew about his wild ways. My doctor contacted his doctor(they did not have the HIPPA laws we have today) because he had serious doubts his test would be negative. My doctor called me back later & confirmed it was indeed negative.

I have a few questions. Was it possible I may have contracted it from my 1st partner and the initial outbreak took months to show up? Is it possible the blood testing was not as accurate then? Okay, even if he was indeed negative, we were having frequent sex for weeks
while I was symptomatic even though I did not know what it was at the time. My initial lesion was at my vaginal opening and he was definitely coming in contact with it. Why would he not have been exposed then? How could he have had sex with at least 60 women AND prostitutes yet not be exposed to anything?!!! I was a late-bloomer as far as dating & did not have my 1st contact until college. Then I met him a few months later.

I guess I was and am still somewhat so angry that I could only have sex with 2 men and he could have sex with dozens of women & prostitutes and still be HSV negative. Seemed so unfair!!! We broke up later about other issues, trust being a major one. Any input?


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deb54
Member since Jun-21-10
333 posts
Sep-12-13, 03:12 PM (CST)
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1. "RE: Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."
In response to message #0
 
   Sorry that you are still having anger issues after all this time. Herpes is no respecter of anyone--and it is possible that the first guy had it and didn't have any symptoms and didn't know. It does stink that the second guy didn't make you aware of his sexual history, but then that is what the conversation before sex should cover--STD risk and testing etc. Also women are just more susceptible to herpes because of our anatomy--so many nooks and crannies and tender bits etc. I'm not sure about the herpes testing back in 1987, but does it really matter to you? I think you just need to blow off some steam and this is the place to do it! How has your life been since 1987? At least you have now joined a great bunch of people here on HHP. Welcome and I hope your life is now okay. Sometimes we just have to walk away from the past and concentrate on the here and now. Good luck.


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LRain_6886
Member since Sep-12-13
4 posts
Sep-12-13, 04:27 PM (CST)
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2. "RE: Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."
In response to message #1
 
   Thanks for the response! Actually, for the most part it has been really good. I actually have not had an outbreak in 14 yrs until about 1 month ago when I had a very small 3 day episode-it was nothing physically. Emotionally it did bring back a lot of anger. Physically for me, it's never been bad, it's just dealing with peoples perceptions & stigma.

I haven't dated in a long time but I have always been honest & up front in the past. Have yet to be rejected and have had about 10 partners since. One of them even had it himself-I just beat him to the talk. Not saying rejection still couldn't happen. My biggest fear is that I will meet someone who I click with on all levels-someone who I think is the "one" and fall totally in love with them & they with me but when I tell them that one thing will hold them back. I feel like I would look back and think that if only it weren't for that one little thing I could have had something wonderful.

As far as the 1st guy, he was quite a player himself, but nothing like the 2nd guy. I did tell him and he panicked and said he had never shown any symptoms. One of my other guy friends who was also friends with guy #1 said his friend was so freaked out that he would say things like "Oh my God! I've never shown any symptoms. Do you think I still might have it?" I knew that if he did have it, it was very possible he did not show symptoms & did not know about it based on his reactions. I do not know if he ever got tested because right after that he went away to law school and I never heard from him again even though I do know he is now a very prominent lawyer in another city.

The 2nd guy and I broke up a few months later. During the relationship he seemed to be very respectful of my feelings about the herpes and never blamed me at the time. When we broke up, I heard through mutual friends that he turned on me and told a bunch of people. He was talking about me as if I was a slut and he was the "good guy" even though I had only slept with 2 people and he had slept with about 60, including prostitutes. He went on to marry a "good girl who did not have anything" according to what mutual friends told me that he said knowing it would get back to me. Well not anything as far as he knew. He really rubbed my face in it. That hurt really bad! They are still married and have teenagers.

I will be 45 in a few weeks and have yet to meet that special someone. I would still love to find a partner & get married. It just has happened yet for whatever reason. It just seems so unfair that other folks who have done really "naughty" things in life get to have these blessings and don't always suffer the consequences.

I guess I am venting. I thing that last outbreak brought all of these emotions back up again but I know I will be okay!


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deb54
Member since Jun-21-10
333 posts
Sep-13-13, 06:47 AM (CST)
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3. "RE: Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."
In response to message #2
 
   Good to vent and then let it go. Don't give up on finding your true love--it can and does happen. There are a lot of us on this site in discordant relationships--our partners don't have herpes. If someone truly cares about you, herpes won't be an issue. So go out there and live your life. I found my partner about three years ago internet dating. I was a widow and he'd been divorced twice. I'm 58 years old (almost 59), so you are still a young thing. Read through some of the old posts on this site and you will meet some really great people. And don't waste any more of your energy on those past relationships. Herpes does not label any of us as bad, dirty or slutty. You are lucky not to experience frequent outbreaks and I'm glad to hear you are responsible in your relationships--trust is so important.


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LRain_6886
Member since Sep-12-13
4 posts
Sep-13-13, 11:58 AM (CST)
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4. "RE: Accuracy of blood tests in 1987."
In response to message #3
 
   Thank you for your kind response@! Makes me feel better already.


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